But it wasn’t only pain.
It was something more complex.
Months later, during a routine follow-up appointment with Álvaro, he looked at me carefully.
“How are you?” he asked.
I almost said “fine” out of habit.
But I stayed silent for a few seconds.
“I’m… here,” I said finally. “I don’t know if I’m fine. But I’m here. And I know what was done to me. No one can erase that.”
Álvaro nodded without speaking. He typed something into the computer, switched screens, and continued his work.
Outside, Madrid kept spinning on its axis, indifferent.
I left the clinic and blended into the crowd on the street.
And for the first time in a long while, I felt something close to a decision of my own.
I couldn’t undo what Diego had done.
I couldn’t change the system that had protected him.
But I could choose how I would live with that reality.
And that choice—small, imperfect—was mine.
Only mine.